Type 1
Serenity or Tyranny - A One's Journey
Gloria Davenport, Ph.D.
What does it mean to be a “One,” they would ask as they slowly backed away, acting as if it were contagious.
“It’s tyranny,” I would blurt out, feeling the pain from many years chained to the compulsions. It’s like a huge yoke around my neck: a burden capable of choking my very life’s breath if I did not prove to myself, my parents, and the world that there was a reason for my being born—that I was worthwhile.
Defenses became skillfully honed as I followed the advice of that inflated ego in me, delighted that I had given him the power to teach me how to ease the pain. “Prove to them you’re worthy, Gloria. Work hard, act like a good girl, be perfect, make things right, keep the lid on, and don’t let your feelings show. I guarantee, you will be accepted, approved of, and loved.”
Gloria Davenport, Ph.D.
What does it mean to be a “One,” they would ask as they slowly backed away, acting as if it were contagious.
“It’s tyranny,” I would blurt out, feeling the pain from many years chained to the compulsions. It’s like a huge yoke around my neck: a burden capable of choking my very life’s breath if I did not prove to myself, my parents, and the world that there was a reason for my being born—that I was worthwhile.
Defenses became skillfully honed as I followed the advice of that inflated ego in me, delighted that I had given him the power to teach me how to ease the pain. “Prove to them you’re worthy, Gloria. Work hard, act like a good girl, be perfect, make things right, keep the lid on, and don’t let your feelings show. I guarantee, you will be accepted, approved of, and loved.”
Reflections of a Type One Physician
Jennifer Schneider, M.D.
For me, learning about the Enneagram was an “Aha” experience. Five years later, I clearly recall how, after digesting the introductory chapters in Helen Palmer’s book, The Enneagram, I turned the page to the first type she described, type One, and identified with its title, “The Perfectionist,” even before reading the description. By the end of the chapter, there was no doubt in my mind that she was describing my type, and there still isn’t. However, what puzzled me was that I could relate to everything she wrote about point One except the part about anger, the chief “passion” of type One. Not me, I remember thinking, not only do I rarely act angry, I hardly ever feel anger.
It was only when I began tuning in to my inner monologue that, to my horror, I recognized the constant stream of judgmental thoughts, resentments, and righteous indignation. Yes, type One is definitely me, disguised anger and all. Today, despite a lot more self-awareness, I still at times find myself in a trance of righteous indignation, unwilling to let it go because, after all, I’m right and how could they do this! But I’m getting better, and I can usually recognize my trance and laugh at myself.